1. Talk - Observing Relationships
2. Guided Awareness Meditation
3. Talk - Disolving Conflict
4. Guided Loving Kindness Meditation - Systematic
5. Talk - Closing
To change our mental patterns we first need to start being aware of how we think, to watch the emotional charge behind everything we think, say and do. Seated meditation provides the training to do this, it teaches us how to quieten down and watch, but we still should aim at taking this a step further. We can do this by cultivating the same awareness that we do during formal meditation in our daily lives, standing guard on what we think and feel. When a thinking pattern or emotional state comes up that we do not want to define and control our lives, we can shut it down and starve it before it does any damage, using the below techniques.
As soon as we notice a negative pattern of thinking happening we need to stop acting on it, resist the desire, it cannot hurt us. The desire can scream, shout at and threaten us, but its threats are hollow, it is like a spoilt child throwing a tantrum in the corner of the room. Once we have resisted the desire we then place our awareness on, not of what the target of the thinking or emotion is, but on what that thought or emotion feels like. We can identify it by its feeling, if it is negative and causes ourselves or others pain, we will feel bad inside, and our calmness will be gone.
Through understanding we can see the danger of following through with negative states of mind, that becoming involved with them will only cause more pain. Understanding this instead of exercising them we can discard them, in the same way that a well dressed person would discard a dirty rag that is sitting on their shoulder we too can feel the same way towards patterns of thought that do not define the type of person we want to be.